Stories From Surrogate Mothers: Part 2

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Would you carry a stranger’s baby? How about your sister’s? Over the last few years, surrogacy has entered our pop culture zeitgeist, with stars like Nicole Kidman and Sarah Jessica Parker using surrogate mothers to complete their families. But surrogacy remains one of the least talked about tools in the fight against infertility. Why do surrogate mothers do what they do? What do they get out of it? And how hard is it to give a child to its parents after having it in your womb for 9 months? Here are five women’s stories about their experience with surrogacy.


Robin Kaufer“The hardest part was when they took the baby from me.” – Robin Kaufer, 50, Seattle, Washington, divorced, 9-year-old girl and 7-year-old boy

I was a gestational carrier for a friend whose child is now three. I had gone through fertility treatments on my own as a single mom. At 40, I turned to in vitro to have my kids. [A friend and I were talking] and she said her sister couldn’t carry a pregnancy, and I said I’d do it.

It took me four tries, and I was surprised they wanted to try the fourth time. Losing three pregnancies was hard on me. But the toughest part was when they took the baby from me. I was cavalier through the whole process … until they physically left, and hormonally I went nuts for a week and a half. It really ripped me apart, which took me by surprise.

My kids seemed to understand that this was Karen and Larry’s baby, and they seemed to be fine with it. Our family was also created from different means and they understood that families come to be in many different ways. I would do it again if I weren’t so old. I think because I had had my own fertility problems, it made me feel very good to do it.


Come back again to read the next surrogate mother story from Kymberli Barney.

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