I was a surrogate who experienced the “just a number” treatment from clinical staff and others associated with assisted reproduction, so I started Prodigy Ovum Donations to provide personalized and ethical services for those in need of third-party reproduction.
When I was growing up, we had a family friend who was a labor and delivery nurse. I remember when she’d come home from a shift, she’d tell us all about “her babies.” She loved each and every baby that was born as if it were her own. Her love of babies and desire to help others played a fundamental role in who I am today. As a surrogacy and egg donation agency facilitator, I like to refer to all of the babies born as a result of my assistance as “my babies.”
Some people say that surrogacy is nine quick months and you get compensated for it. Well, there’s not really enough money in the world to take on what we do as surrogates. I don’t view it as a job, but some people better understand it if you describe it as a 24-7 job. And if you calculate the compensation over the nine months for which you are getting “paid,” it doesn’t amount to anything.
To me, it’s a gift to be able to be a surrogate. Nothing can replace the expressions I saw on the parents the moment my surrogate twins were born. You see them hold their children for the first time, and they cry. You cannot put a price tag on that, and to see that twice in my lifetime along with witnessing the birth of my own children is something that I will always treasure.
I experienced such a high after giving birth knowing that I’ve given something that very few people can give. I knew within hours of delivering the first set of surrogate twins that I had to do this again…and I’d even had a c-section! I did it once more, and now I’m done because it’s time now for me to give all my time to my own family—my two daughters and my partner, Misti—instead of other families.
Surrogates are often misunderstood. Most are employed, have insurance, and are financially able to support their own families. We are not trashy women who want to take advantage of anyone. People ask me about being a surrogate and whether or not I miss and love the babies I give birth to. I do love them, but I love them like I love my niece and nephew. They are not mine to want to have at my home and raise. I want to see pictures, get updates, and hear what they’re doing this summer, but I have my own family and life to live.
If you would like more information about becoming a surrogate mother or about surrogacy in general, please contact Surrogates Across America.